What is the difference between "question of intentions" and wedding "vows?

I know that a bride and groom exchange vows...some books call when the preacher asks do you___ take ____ to be your etc. and then they each answer " I do" the vows while other places call that the question of intentions....are we supposed to answer " I do" and then repeat our vows or do we just do one or the other...i know its really whatever we want but.....what traditionally happens?

Hi - I'm a marriage officiant. We are often asked this question, because the modern ceremony has squeezed together what used to be separate parts of the marriage process.

The Intention, which is now usually part of the wedding ceremony, is actually the betrothal. You are each asked by the officiant, priest, etc. if you intend to marry the other person of your own free will, and you answer in front of the community. This used to be done at a separate time than the wedding, sometimes you did it in front of the village, and there was no priest, and in some cultures, it was as legally binding as marriage. This is the older form of marriage, which might be followed a year later by a wedding ceremony conducted by a religious officiant. Our 'common law marriage' is part of this history.

In the British Isles, once you agreed to be married, you would announce (or publish on the church bulletin board) your "Banns", your intention to be married, 3 weeks in a row. That was time for anyone who had any objection to your marriage to come forward (for instance, another living husband or wife, or someone proving that you were too closely related to marry). You could also sue the other person if they broke off the marriage after you had promised your intention to marry in front of witnesses ("breach of promise of marriage"). In Canada, you can still have the banns read in church as an alternative to a marriage license.

Nowadays, the Intention statement is said by each of you INDIVIDUALLY in front of the congregation, (sometimes at the back of the church, as the medieval betrothal happened at the church door, and then you walk up to the front for the rest of the ceremony), or in a civil ceremony, you each say the Intention so it can be heard by the witnesses at the beginning and then say your vows TO EACH OTHER, sometimes after the officiant offers a prayer, or a small sermon/statement on the meaning of marriage. Also, it is common to have the two questions now combined into one, or sometimes the VOWS (your promises to each other) are combined with the ring ceremony.

As long as you include a part where each person says it is their own decision to marry the other person, and then they say to each other that they accept that person as their spouse, you have married each other according to the legal requirements.

There is a short article in Wikipedia which has some interesting cultural facts on the history of betrothals, and a LONG one on Drizzle explaining a bit of medieval tradition and marriage law, and the legal bits. Cheers!

In the movies and such, the "I do"s are the vows. In real life, it depends on the couple. Most consider them to be a declaration of intent while the vows are a short declaration of why you want that person to be your spouse. The latter is much more common outside of the media.

The Question of Intent is just that, asking if your intent is to be married.
Sometimes it's asked like the 'for richer, for poorer' marriage vow; especially if the couple has written their own vows.
Other times the Question is simpler like after the meaning of marriage is explained the minister/officiant might ask if you've come in that spirit to be married & accept those responsibilities. Some ceremonies contain the Intent Question, while others do not.
I always have it in mine in some form depending on the couple's vows.
Vows are what you promise to your beloved.

Standards are different from state to state, not only for what constitutes a marriage ceremony, but who can perform a ceremony & what those requirements are. So please, don't go by the movies or what sweet Great Aunt Matilda might tell you.
Speak to your officiant; not only about this but any concerns & questions you might have; and about what you want your ceremony to contain. They should be able to tell you what you have to have in your ceremony & what is just 'fluff'.
If they get annoyed or put out about your questions, I suggest you find another officiant.

As far as I understand it, the questions, or statement of intent as my officiant calls it, is sort of a question that is held over from times when marriages were forced.

The 2 sets of questions, the first is the statement of intent, when the officiant attempts to have you say aloud that you come to be married of your own free will, and that you are fully aware that you know what you are getting yourself in for. Second is the vows when you actually make the promise.

So, to recap:
Statement of intent:
You know you're about to take this man forever, right? And this is your own idea, right? You're cool with it?

Vow:
Do you take this man forever?

question of intentions is informal unlike the wedding vows wherein it is sacred and two people are bonded together by a piece of paper and by god

sometimes they're together sometimes not.

usually the officiant has some sort of question about entering of your own free will or taking this person to be your spouse. you answer I do. You're addressing the officiant. The vows, you repeat to each other. that's your declaration to each other.

I'm guessing it depends on your officiant. In any case, they will go over this with you during your rehearsal. I think you will be suprised to find how laid out it will all be for you by whoever is conducting your ceremony!