What is the best way to get my 4 year old daughter to communicate more with less crying?

I thought by now, at the age 4, she would be more talkative when she needs something, instead of crying all the time!

My stepdaughter would cry because she would get so frustrated that we couldn't understand what it was she was trying to say. It was very, VERY hard to do, but we had to ignore her if she cried about it, but explain to slow down and try again. And if we kind of knew what she wanted and she made sense, we'd have a mini lesson on how to say the word.

It's more than of a frustration which is why they cry. We worked SO damn hard with my stepdaughter to practice talking and reading. Computer learning games were her favorite because it was cool and new. I remember when she got the right answer she'd do a little dance and say Yesssssss! LOL. But if she can practice more, she'll be more confident and will cry a lot less. Read stories at night together. If she wants to watch TV or DVD's, make sure it's educational rather than a cartoon. It really just takes lots of reassuring and one on one attention with them.

And positive reinforcement is key! I'm actually mailing a package today to my stepdaughter (she's with her Mom right now) and it has a special present int here for her because she sounds great over the phone with her speaking. Her Mom said they've been working hard together, reading and having her teachers do one on one learning with her. It's made a difference and I want my stepdaughter to know that me and her Daddy are very proud of her. It gives them something to look forward to and shows them that learning really isn't so bad!!

And be patient! Because it doesn't happen overnight :)

Best of luck!

Well it all depends on what shes crying for. Maybe it's something that she can't say right or shes upset that you don't understand what she is trying to say. Just tell her "I can't understand you when your crying, please talk to me & tell me what you need" Teach her some more wors, make sure she knows what she needs to know. Good luck.

You ignore her when she whines or cries. It'll be hard, but it's necessary. She's old enough to know better. Explain that you don't answer her if she whines and cries and don't do it. Ignore the behavior and she'll soon realize that it gets her nowhere.

make her use her words and dont give in to the whining.

you need to tell her, mommy cant understand you when ur crying. Then tell her that you are not going to listen untill she talks like a big girl. my daughter is 2 and I found that this method works. I had to ignore her while she threw a fit the first few times but now she asks me for what she wants and it is great. She still has her moments tho. All children do.

She should be well above the age where you can reason with her and she will understand! Tell her until she can learn to talk and ASK for what she wants instead of crying then you will not give into her. You must be consistant or it will never work.