What are some suggestions for dealing with teenagers smoking pot?

I discovered that my 14 yr old son has been experimenting with marijuana. Any good advice for dealing with this situation? He and I have a very good relationship and talk a lot. We've discussed all of the negative effects and parental fears. Of course, he's been grounded and lost all privileges and freedoms. I am still terrified of what he may turn to next. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Your son has just a little too much free time on his hands. You can talk again about the things that he enjoys doing. See if he won't get involved with a sport, cultivate a skill, volunteer his time or pick up a part time job. He wants to act grown up. Hand him some responsibility. He can't work and be high, play ball and be high, teach a kid how to do a math equation and be high. Help him to occupy his time with the things he loves. He will have less time to hang with the kids that are influencing him. Talk to him about what he is looking for in a relationship with a girl. Is smoking pot going to attract the kind of girl he would like or just make her shrug and walk away....with her thinking, "What a loser." There are a million other things he can spend his money on. Ask him what he does want to purchase next and discuss what it will take to earn it. Eventually he's gonna want a drivers license and a car. He needs to start working toward that goal now. You've handled this really well. You have good communication. You are what stands between him and poor decision making. Remind him that people will always suggest he do a wrong thing sooner or later. And sooner or later no one but himself is going to be there to make a right decision. Other people trust folk who can make right decisions. These are respected people. Who does he choose to become?

Do you or your partner smoke weed? How did you find out? Did he tell you?

My son started with pot at 14 he is now 23 and a tweeker, smokes meth everyday. It's great that you can talk with him actually it's amazing by todays standards. Now I know people that have smoked for 30 years and they function daily in jobs and socially. He may never stop or he may stop. If you can go to some drug counseling together or just keep that door open that you have with him, he might tell you if he is wanting to try something more. Get him to tell you what his motivation is for smoking. I hope the best for you. Having a son on drugs is a difficult thing..........

Punishment for wrong things done is never a good solution, if it is then we will have lesser or no criminals in our society with our existing penal institutions.The question right now is why do teenagers turn to drugs? Yes it may be curiosity and plain peer pressure_ somethings adolescents have plenty of. It is this stage that most mothers fear most. Its often called the most turbulent among life's stages of development. As a mother, you are on the right tract, keep the communications line open, be there for him. Once a couple discovered that their son was into drugs, he was convulsing due to a high fever. He cried and beg them to stay by his side, they did. They spent the entire night taking turns in taking care of him and let him sleep in their own bed. he woke up smiling to see his folks tired and haggard from lack of sleep. He said to them " I never knew how much you love me until now". Finally, model the perfect parent of all_ GOD. Good luck and keep loving your son.

you've done all you can do. your son is on his way to becoming an adult. until then, he will make some incredibly stupid decisions.

the only problems with pot is that it is illegal, lung-wise pot is exactly like smoking filterless cigarettes, and pot kills brain cells. it is in no way physically addictive (but some people think they need it every day). many of my friends smoke pot, or "green", and i've even tried it a few times, but i didn't like it because it make me feel the equilvalent of jet lag.

the best thing you can do is to keep the lines of communication open. don't be a pushover, but don't be an authoritarian either.

stress that he could go to jail or juvie if he and his friends get caught!

ps) the "gateway" theory is c-r-a-p.

Seriously, don't make a big deal out of it. He could be into a lot more than that. These days, pot is the least of your problems. In my opinion, I'd much rather find a roach in my daughters car than a 6 pack. Or some meth, or crack, or worse. I wouldn't want my child go to jail because of violence. I wouldn't want my child coming home pregnant. Pot is nothing, and believe me, they are going to at least check it out. No matter how hard you try. Just keep conversation open. Let him know you disapprove of it. But how can you really ground a 14 year old? They are in school all day. Doesn't really solve any thing. At this point whats done is done, and he's right at the age where you just need to some what let him make is own mistakes, and let him live with them. He may not be an adult, but if you push, you could just push the wrong way.
Good luck.

you are right to be concerned, cannabis is a gateway drug and can lead ppl on to more serious drugs, i work in an addiction clinic and i can see what heroin and cocaine has done to the ppl that attend.

Honestly, this should scare you and I hope you don't listen to anyone else that responds so flippantly about it. Unfortunately in the current state of our world, drugs are reaching kids your sons age which is appalling! I would say now is not the time to be your son's "friend". You need to make it abundantly clear that neither this NOR any other drug (including alcohol) are allowed, PERIOD. Now is the time to stop this dead in its tracks. I've seen the affect of drug use on a family that is close to me, and it destroys everyone's life, believe me.

Good luck.

I think you are on the right track. A firm but gentle approach: Deny privileges and let him know how strongly you disapprove. But give him a chance to redeem himself. He is pretty young, and he is going to mess up.

And for what its worth, I don't buy into the whole "gateway drug" thing. I smoked pot for a while in college. Honestly, its not that big of a deal.

Ahh, crap. Stories like this really get to me. I watched my sisters self-destruct over the years as we grew up. They started with pot. My cousin in jail now for meth charges. He started with pot. My niece just graduated and has started stripping for money. Although I don't know for sure I think she's been taking some kind of drugs. I was raised in a culture of pot. During family get-togethers my uncles would bust out the bongs and the kitchen would fill with smoke. It's a complete miracle I never tried it. I wish I had some good advice for you but I don't. I'd say use your good relationship and open communication to really stress how this can be the beginning of the end for him. I know, i know, lots of people smoke pot and live productive lives. Big deal, I know waaay more people who live on the fringes of society because of drugs and they all started with pot.

P.S. Those uncles are now both semi-homeless, divorced, shadows of their former selves.

Remember, the harder you try and control then the faster they are going to bolt away. Be understanding and let him know that you are there for him and that he can come to you to talk ANYTIME. If they can't talk to you who are they going to go to?

And 'turn to next'???? I know of people that have smoked pot for over 30 years and NEVER once had a desire to go onto other drugs. The desire for hard drug DOES NOT come from smoking pot!!

Well, this is a drug that many Americans smoke. It is readily available and considered a gateway drug, BUT - don't be fooled by any propaganda you hear about it. Alchohol is much worse and is LEGAL, and in a few years he will be able to consume that and there will be nothing you can do about it. SO - Good Luck

call the police for help on intervention help.

Sometimes teen agers just want to experiment and that is all as you already taking action and has given him consequences ask him why he tried it in the first place and explain to him why you do not want him to be on pot you sound like a caring parent and every kid needs that and support as well good luck

Get him into drug counseling - NOW! (We didn't get my son in early enough - took him years to get unhooked).
Then ease up on the restrictions - you want to keep the lines of communication open.

*sigh* teenagers will experiment with with marijuana nothing you can do about....the next step usually after weed (in suburn America) is ectascy. *shrug* did both and I turned out O.K. not addicted to either and that was 10 years ago for me next year. I have a good job and can honestly say...I had fun doing it and don't regret it.

*shrug* you gotta except that he may do it and just try to provide him a stable environment so he doesn't rebell worst by becoming a drug addict.